If There's Not Enough Hours in the Day — You're Counting Them Wrong

Do you feel like there are never enough hours in the day?

In this episode, John explores why so many business owners feel trapped by their own calendars, constantly chasing time, success, and opportunities outside of themselves. He explains why your real value is not in the number of hours you work, but in your presence, focus, strengths, and ability to choose what truly deserves your energy.

For more on the Deru approach to leadership from the inside out, visit https://www.derunation.com/TGM-Hike 

00:01:04 — When There’s Never Enough Time

00:03:00 — Amazon vs. Rolex and Ferrari

00:06:25 — The Signs You Have a Problem with Time

00:08:35 — Stop Chasing Success

00:10:14 — What Really Built Your Business

00:13:20 — Letting Go of Proving Yourself

00:16:15 — The Hierarchy of Waste

00:20:10 — The Three Buckets of Work

00:22:30 — Making the Hours Count

00:23:55 — The Grounded Man Hike 

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 0:00

You're gonna stop your friends ringing you anymore because you're you're no crack, you're no fun, you're all work, work, work, you're all busy, busy, busy. You've no time for life, you've nothing else to talk about. Is that the life you want to live? Is that how you want to work? Because if it's not, it's time to let that go. Welcome to the Grounded Man Podcast by Deru. I am your host, John Douglas, and founder of Daru, and this space is for hardworking men building businesses, carrying responsibility, and providing for their families who feel they should be freer. You see, the world has changed, and leading through hard work and long hours now limits a man's influence. The new way is mastering the inner game of leadership so you can carry it well, enjoy what you're building, and still feel free. Deru is leadership for the 21st century. Did you ever find yourself saying there's not enough hours in the day? I haven't got a minute for myself. Where does the time go? Time is flying by. Because if you've found yourself saying that, and maybe saying that pretty regularly, I want you to listen to this episode because this is going to help you reframe that whole conversation in your head. I want you to think of supply and demand. Your business is built on supply and demand. And companies with different strategies around how they control or how they build supply and how to build demand. And I want to take two examples. The first one is Amazon. Everyone knows Amazon, the business. Um, they're worldwide, they're global, they're very convenient, they have a lot of um accessibility, very easy to get as long as you have an internet connection and a postal address. You can get things delivered to you, you can buy on online. And so that's been a game changer, I suppose, and it's disrupted a lot of the market. And you know, businesses have gone out of business over it and everything, everything like that. But I'm not worried so much about maybe even the ethics of Amazon. I know there's that's a different question. I just want to want you to think about the concept of Amazon itself. So it's widely available, and so what it's done is it's invested very heavily because for many, many years uh Amazon lost money because it kept reinvesting money into building the infrastructure to build the channels of distribution. And what it's done is it's grown the demand by growing the supply. So basically, I can offer it to a wide range of people, and because I can do that and serve them conveniently, quickly, very efficiently, we've actually increased the demand for our products by increasing the supply first. And that's one way to grow. Now it requires scale and it requires a lot of investment and all that, but it's one way to grow. There's another way to grow though, and the other way to grow is more about scarcity and exclusivity. And I want you to think of brands like Ferrari or Rolex. Uh, and these brands operate off this way because if you want to buy a Ferrari, if you decide today, do you know what I'm going to buy a Ferrari and you actually have the money in the bank to do so, do you think you can actually go out today and buy a Ferrari? The chances are that you you can't, at least not a new one. And even maybe even a secondhand one, probably not. Because what they do is they actually interview you, they actually find out who you are. And whether it's they're actually doing it from a place of kind of truth because it's aligned with their values, or whether they're just kind of making a suppose an exclusivity factor around it and an elitist factor around it, doesn't really matter. The same applies. You have to go through an interview process, you have to be selected, you have to wait, you have to kind of sign contracts that you can't sell the car within a certain amount of years. It's very, very difficult. There's a lot of barriers to entry, and and there's scarcity there. You know, there's literally scarcity, and Rolex is the same. They'll probably kind of try and convince you that, you know, you know, you'll be much better off with a Casio watch than a Rolex and uh or something like that. And so they they they create this kind of aura around the brand. And so what they've done is they've actually made the supply very scarce, and because they've done so, it's made a premium and it's increased the demand for their products. And so this is how these brands have grown. So different brands have different strategies, and the reason I'm talking with them because it's easy to see, but sometimes we're walking around like our time is Amazon, that we're widely available, our calendar is always open, we have no boundaries, and uh and we operate like this. But in actual fact, we should be operating more like Rolex or Ferrari because okay, there is one side of us that is kind of energy, it's it's nature, it's it's the essence of everything, and it's infinite because it never ceases to exist, it always just changes from one form to another, and you know, our thoughts become things, and that's an infinite, that's an infinite side to us, okay. But we also are operating with a with a with a mind and body that have a lifespan, and so we have a very short amount of time. You know, life has been on Earth for nearly four billion years, and we live for, if we're lucky, 80, 90 years, okay. So we are we we don't we're not even a spot or a speck on the whole time frame of humanity. So we we are very scarce, but I think we're operating like we're Amazon to try and get every opportunity when actually we need to be more selective about where our time and where our energy goes. Because the if you're saying like I don't have a minute in the day, where's my time gone? My calendar's all over the place, it's always full. And you know, sometimes you even try and convince yourself that next month will be different, next quarter is going to be different. But the only reason it feels different is because you're not in it. You know, the proximity makes it feel like it's less busy because you're not there yet. And that's thinking about time in linear fashion. And so what the problem is that when we operate like Amazon and not like Rolex, we overvalue what's outside of us and we undervalue what's inside. Because that's what those brands do very well. They they know their value inside and they align with that, and that actually creates an attraction in towards them. They kind of suck it in. It's very attractive marketing, having that exclusivity, having that status and that kind of mentality. You'll know if you have a problem with time if you feel like there's never enough time. You're always busy doing something, but then at the end of the day or the week, you say you actually look back and say, What did I actually get done? You're working long hours, you're missing out on moments with your family, you're missing out on your own personal time to look after your health, to go and explore, to go and have energy for life. You're not getting to work on the business, you're constantly stuck in it, maybe firefighting or in admin, and you can't prioritize because everything feels urgent. So think about it for a moment.

SPEAKER_01 7:16

Imagine that wasn't the case. What would be different?

SPEAKER_00 7:19

You'd have space for working on the business, to execute strategy, to even take a step back and develop the strategy and plan beyond this week and next week to actually plan three months down the road, six months down the road, having a vision for the next five years. You'd actually have time to do that and time to focus on it. You'd have time in your week to knock off a few hours earlier or come in late someday to have more flexibility in the business that you actually own and run without having to worry about not be there or not having it fall apart. You'd have clear priorities and time allocated proportionally to them. And you'd have a calm week, a calm calendar, and you'd have presence for your team and your family and everyone that you come into contact with. Imagine you had all that instead of having the chaos and the chaotic schedules, the constant go, go, go, the burning out, the boom bush cycles, the fatigue, the tiredness, the never-ending hum and drain of life, of busyness. Imagine that was all gone because that's possible. It's possible if you start thinking differently. And so you need to create a shift in how you think. So, what's the gap? What actually has to change for you to experience that positive relationship with time and presence versus the chaos and the burnout? So the shift that has to happen is that you have to stop chasing success and you have to start recognizing that you are the success. Because every time you're chasing time, really you're chasing the success. Because why do you chase time in the first place? Because you want to do more. Why do you want to do more? Because you feel like you have to do more to succeed. You have to work harder to succeed. And so you need to start thinking about yourself and all of this. You need to start recognizing that your success is actually inside. Because what is your time? Your time is a measure of your movement, basically, you know, from nine o'clock to five o'clock, whatever that is. Okay. But it's also the measure of everything else, the measure of all the other things that move in your life. And so that's what time measures. It measures the passing of events or the movement of things. So time is just a measure of something. To say you don't own your own time or you don't feel like you own your own energy or your own headspace means you don't own yourself. Something else outside you owns it. And so that shift that you have to make is stop overvaluing everything that's outside and start overvaluing or recognizing everything that's inside. Because what has built your business? What's built it? Has it just been your time? Has it just been the number of hours you put in? Is it the hours that you're counting, or is it more about making those hours count? And what I mean by that is recognizing your strengths, your inner success are your strengths. What are your strengths? Is it did your time build a business, or was it your passions? Was it your love? Was it your energy? Was it your effort? Was it your skill set? Was it your experience? Was it your even your frustrations? Maybe a problem you wanted to solve. There's something inside. Was it your creativity? Was it your clarity? Was it your decision making? Was it your leadership? Or was it just your time? Because if it was just your time, then maybe you do need more time. But if it was any of those other things that really built your business, then you don't really need more time. What you actually need is more presence. Because when you have more presence, that is when you're being intentional in the moment with whatever's happening outside or whoever's around you to use those strengths that are inside and bring them through. Almost look at presence as like a gateway into all your strengths. And so it's not so much about the time you put in as to how well you can apply your strengths. And that's what presence allows you to do. And this is a whole flip because instead of chasing things outside, now we realize actually, do you know what? The wealth that I'm trying to achieve or I'm chasing is actually inside. And if I create the right conditions inside by recognizing more of my strengths, I can actually focus better. I can actually understand where to prioritize, what's most important, and how much maybe time to allocate to each of those things so that I get my strengths. There's a saying that Ralph Waldo Emmer said, whatever you focus on grows. And I've kind of adapted that to say that whatever you touch turns to gold. So your whole presence and energy and attention, wherever that goes to, it always grows. Think about your business. Anything you you know yourself, anything you put your full mind to, it gets better. If there's something wrong with your relationship in your marriage, you give some time and energy to it, and it gets better. If there's something wrong with your finances, you give some time and energy to it, and it gets better. So what makes it better? It's your time, it's your focus, it's your energy, it's your presence, because it's all the strengths are coming through that. And that's the gap that needs to close. Is that you need to start stop chasing things outside and start saying that the wealth is on the inside and that the more I see it, the more I can share it. Because if you don't, you're gonna keep chasing time, you're gonna keep being busy, you're gonna keep missing out moments with your family, you're gonna keep carrying that laptop and phone with you on holidays and missing those moments. You're gonna stop your friends ringing you anymore because you're you're no crack. You're no fun. You're all work, work, work, you're all busy, busy, busy. You've no time for life, you've nothing else to talk about. Is that the life you want to live? Is that how you want to work? Because if it's not, it's time to let that go. And so, what do you actually need to clear to get rid of that? What do you actually need to let go of? You need to let go of the idea that that the wealth or the success is something that's outside of myself, that I need to prove something. You need to be able to let go of the idea that you have to prove something to somebody else because you're only ever proving it to yourself. You have to let go of that ego and see that actually my true wealth is on the inside. And the more present I become, the more I can share it. You also might be afraid to let go of some of these things. Maybe that's why your your time feels tied to certain areas of the business because you're afraid to let go what might happen. Maybe you're afraid things might fall apart if you do. You're afraid of what you might come back to. You're afraid of it landing back in your desk anyway, and you'll have to do it just later on after the client is pissed off. Another idea that you have to let go of is that opportunities are limited. There's always opportunities. There's always an abundance of opportunities for the man with the right mindset to see them. You have to start thinking abundantly. You start to start seeing them because opportunities are not something you get, they're something you give. If you see opportunities to give more value, that's the opportunity that you get, and that's that's what will, you know, there's a law of cause and effect. The cause is the giving, the effect is the receiving, what you get back from that. So there's going to be endless opportunities for you to give. Endless. And they'll always end up with you receiving back. So you have to let go of the idea that there's scarcity because there's an abundance. Okay? There's an abundance of opportunities. That's not to say that you waste opportunities. No, you take the ones that are most meaningful and most aligned to you, most true to you, most genuine to you, and you let go of the other ones. The ones that you take on because you feel like maybe I should, just in case. Maybe I won't get this, uh, maybe I won't get the opportunity to do uh a big job anymore. I'll take on a few of these small ones. And yes, they take up your time. Yes, they might pay some bills, but then you ask yourself, were they even worth it? Were they even worth your time? Were they even worth your energy? And the fact you're even asking that question, you already know the answer. So what do you actually need to accept? Because okay, getting rid of something, letting go of releasing something is is okay with talk about that. It's another step, actually letting go of it, okay? Because this feels like betraying yourself, because it's betraying an old identity. So you might think it's irresponsible to let go of something. It almost feels like you don't care about it anymore. And when you've put so much effort into building a business, the idea of like surrendering or letting go, letting it go, that feels totally irresponsible. But I'd actually argue it's the opposite. Because when you let go of certain outcomes, letting go of things you can't control, what other people think, when you let go of these things, you actually have more energy back. And you've actually more energy back to focus on what's more impactful, higher impact stuff, like working on the business rather than being stuck in the business. And I spoke a few moments ago about realizing that opportunities are abundance. So maybe skipping over a few of them might feel very ungrateful. That might feel ungrateful because you're wasting resources. But you have to remember that there's a hierarchy of waste, and your time is at the top of the list. Because even if you lose your health, most times you can get it back. Now, some people don't, but most times you can. If you lose money, you can always get it back. If you lose opportunities, you'll always get more opportunities. So there's a hierarchy of waste, and the number one thing not to waste is your time and your presence. And so, therefore, don't be ungrateful by wasting opportunities. See it the opposite way. See it as you actually being grateful that you have the choice. You have the choice to choose higher impact focuses, higher impact priorities over lower ones. You actually have that choice, and that's the abundance in itself. The third thing is the number of hours that you work. So you work long, hard hours, you built a business, and that got you to where you are today. I'm not saying you did it wrong. Um, every business needs seasons, different seasons, and there's seasons for grinding and getting the work done, but there's also seasons then where you need to change to grow to the next level. And working longer and harder is often not how you get to the next level. In fact, it actually keeps you trapped even more. So you have to really let go of this idea. This is the this is probably the most difficult one, letting go of that identity that I need to do more because I'm only valuable in what I do. Okay, you need to let go of that idea. And that feels like betraying that hard work must be earned. That's the piece of the old identity you're betraying, that success must be earned through hard work. So that if it feels easy, like imagine, for instance, you just freed up one day in your week for things that were really impactful for the business and your team, and in six months' time your business is at a new level. And it would actually was a lot easier than you thought. Imagine that for a moment. It was a lot easier than you thought. Would you feel like you deserve that? Strange question. A lot of guys would feel uncomfortable with that. Because if it's if it's been received and it was easy, then it can't be can't be value, it can't be worth it. It can't, I can't be worth it. I haven't done enough for it. So that's the part that needs to change. You see, this is how the subconscious mind works, this is how these beliefs work, and they hold us back because they stop us making decisions and taking action. So, what decisions do you need to make going forward? As I said already, you need to give yourself permission to put time at the top of that hierarchy of waste. Everything else is secondary. Time is the number one, and that's really your presence. Because what you're doing there is you're giving yourself permission to choose what's important to you and let that guide your decisions, let that guide your focus. So ask yourself those questions. Instead of like, am I ready for it? Will I be able? Flip the whole conversation. Does this deserve my time? Because whatever I focus on will grow. Whatever I touch will turn to gold. So is this worth my presence? Are these people worth my presence? Is this worth my focus and energy? You need to ask yourself, what is what are those things that's worth your presence, your time, your focus, your attention, your energy? What is worth that for you? Because that's you're the Rolex, remember. You're in charge here. The problem is you don't feel like you're in charge of your own life when you don't own when you when you feel like you've no time. That's the problem. So you need to flick this and actually, I on the one, I'm the source of this wealth, on the source of my own success. I have the strengths inside. So give yourself permission to recognize them. Practice gratitude on these. Think of like five things that you're really strong at. That other people, you can't really see it that much in other people. Like you can be, you can be grateful for even having your own ambitions. A lot of people don't have the ambition. Be grateful for your ambition. Be grateful for the problems that you have. Be grateful that you get to lead other people. Be grateful that you can provide for other families. Be grateful for all those things. See them as a privilege, not a problem. And here's a quick exercise. I want you to do this. You can do this in your head as you're listening to me. I want you to think about the last few weeks in work. Okay. And I want you to divide the tasks that you've done over the last few weeks in work into three buckets. So there's low value tasks. Low value tasks are things like admin, firefighting, um, chasing invoices, repetitive tasks. That's the low value bucket. That's really working in the business on the front line. Then there's the mid-value bucket. The mid-value bucket is a step up from that, and it's more about management, monitoring, supervising, planning, that kind of area. Okay. And then there's a third bucket, and it's the high value bucket. And the high value bucket, that's really where true leadership lives. Because this is all about development and growth. Development of the team, of the culture, of the processes, of the products, of the partnerships, of your network. Just all working on the business. Okay. So it's not really tied to the day-to-day running. It's all things that, you know, if you if you do them in six months' time, we'll be at the next level, or in 12 months' time, we're at the next level. Or if I don't do them in 12 months' time, we'll more or less be where we are. So you have three buckets. I want you to think about the last few weeks. What percentage of your time was spent in each bucket? In the low, in the mid, and uh the high value? Because a lot of guys, when we do this exercise for the first time, they'll probably say 20% of their time is in that high value bucket, and the other 80% is a mix of the low and the mid. And so if you really think about it, are you really valuing your time? Are you really valuing your strengths? Are you really living true to yourself and your strengths and your passions and your experience and your wisdom when you're only spending a small proportion of your time in what's highest value? Are you really looking at yourself like the Rolex, or are you looking like yourself as a commodity? See, if you start looking at yourself more like the Rolex, that the true source of wealth and success is actually coming from what's inside, that's gonna have a dramatic impact on not only your life, but on your business. You're gonna start treating your time at its true level. You're not gonna start, you're not gonna start counting the hours anymore. You're gonna start making the hours count. You're gonna build a sense of urgency within yourself, a sense of motivation, not because you're chasing something, because you know that you want to give more, you know that you have more to give and you want to do it. So just remember what's built to your business, was it just time or was it all those strengths? And if it's all those strengths, then realize that I need to put my time into working on myself, putting time working on the business, on my relationships, on the things that are most important, because everything I touch will turn to gold. So if you've resonated with any of the ideas that I've spoken about today, and you want to learn more, or you want to actually get out a hold of your time and yourself and your life and your business and take control and know yourself better and know those strengths inside and allow them to come out. You can click the link below. I'll have a calendar link, book a call with me, we can have a chat and see what the next steps are for you. Thank you very much. Thanks for listening. Thank you for listening to this week's episode. The wisdom here doesn't come from me, it actually comes through me from the men like you that I walk alongside. And if the conversation today landed and you would rather live it rather than just listen to it, I want to invite you to the grounded man hike. It's a day in nature with a small group of founders and leaders, men who carry a lot and want to carry it lighter. And there's no slides, pitch or agenda, just honest conversation and open ground. The link is in the description below. Leave your details and I'll be back to you personally. Thanks for being here, and I'll see you next week.